Letter to President Elect....please take our dog!

I've heard Obama promised his girls a puppy after the election, and, even though he's not a puppy, I think Schaeffer would be a great addition to their family. I'm listing some reasons why the Obama family should pick Schaeffer as the First Dog, but please help me by adding to this list.

1. He's potty trained. You don't want to risk any messes on White House property!
2. He's a homebody. They wouldn't have to worry about him exploring and getting lost. He likes the safety of home!
3. His natural good looks. Perfect for photo opps!
4. He comes from the herding group. Corgis, even though they are short and small, know how to be bossy and get people moving....possibly aid in herding the Democrats and Republicans in the same room to work together. Who knows, maybe all they needed is a little bossy push from an unexpecting little furry friend.
5. He needs attention. Poor thing doesn't get much around here, but with the Obama girls and the press, he'd be in heaven!

Now I'm not going to lie, he does have a few setbacks. But depending on your perspective, it could make him more endearing, right?
1. His health. He either has a defective liver or a sensitive stomach. But if you feed him the specific kind of food, he's his happy, bossy self.
2. His tendency to bark. Annoying to some (me, especially), but maybe they'd appreciate knowing when people are approaching. I would imagine their family would want a little privacy and he definitely would inform them of any impending interruptions. Note: But if you give him some space to run off some of that energy, like the Rose Garden for example, it may not be as much of an issue.

Now this may not be the most persuasive, but it's honest...and they've got to appreciate that, right? Anybody have any more reasons I need to add to the list? This pregnant mama needs to reduce the number of living things she has to clean up after.....

I'm finally getting some photos off my phone and organized, so I thought I'd post some random pics over the last few months.
By the way, this is my 200th post! Actually that's kind of sad considering how many years I've been blogging.....oh well.

For Halloween, we were Care Bears; Love-a-Lot & Good Luck Bear...and of course, Addy the Dalmation!

For H's birthday, she recieved lots of fun costumes! Here's Fancy Nancy and Ariel.

A trip to the zoo with her best friends!

And one of my best friends being silly in Wisconsin. =)

A cute shirt over the 4th of July....obviously...in Oshkosh, Nebraska

An iPhone playdate

Daddy hoarding all the Care Bears for himself.....I have an even funnier picture of this that I'm not allowed to post!

And my accessorized girl. She wanted to wear her scarf just like LoLo! We miss you, Laurie! Eventually this scarf became a belt.

My 4 year old Hannah

Hannah,
Today you turned 4. A fancy, girly, smart, talkative 4 years old. Although in the midst of so much attention today, no one would know you're very talkative. It's fun to observe you in all kinds of settings...it helps me understand you a bit better. So many times I'm looking at whatever is happening from my perspective, and I need to stop and try to see it from yours.

You had a princess party. Katie and Addison came over, put on fancy clothes for the royal party, danced, made necklaces, and of course ate cake.



Then many, many more friends and family came over for dinner and cake. My favorite picture is when you were waiting to blow out your candle, listening to us sing to you....I think you were giggling and teary at the same time. I'm pretty sure I was too.

I love you, Hannah. I'm so grateful for my beautiful, kind girl.
Mom

Tagged

My sister tagged me...and it sounded kind of fun. Here's the 6th picture in my 6th album:

This was when Schaeffer got lots of love and attention. And now all he hears is "Schaeffer, kitchen! Now!" I'm far from the best dog owner, but this picture makes me smile. I think I was pregnant with Hannah in this picture....and about 7 months along, like I am now. Lots has changed since then, poor dog.

Would anyone like to take him home and shower him with the attention any dog deserves? I'm not kidding. Please take him.

Okay. Now I'm tagging Vickie & Laurie.

Because a few of you asked.....

Fancy Nancy and the baby belly

for documentation

Hannah: I love you so much and want to stay with you forever.

Me: I love you too. Remember this when you're thirteen, okay?

Hannah: Okay.

Swim lessons update

Bribery.
So far, this has helped. Along with swimming together on family swim night.

Today's prize for bravery: goggles.

Tonight, she screamed, then cried ONLY when she was on the edge. When they took her out to practice the strokes, she quieted right down and did what she was supposed to do. I'm still baffled at why she cried at the easiest part and frankly I'm rather irritated about it. But she DID get in and eventually joined her class. (Last week, another instructor took her by herself. That's one way to get private lessons, I guess!) Baby steps, right?

Next week's goal: no crying AT ALL. The prize? Glow in the dark finger nail polish.

Everything I learned, I learned from swim lessons....

So I thought it would be a great idea to sign Hannah up for some sort of activity this fall. Our town has so many great resources, it can be a bit overwhelming. But I thought I'd keep it simple. Hannah tends to be cautious and uncomfortable in the water, so I figured swim lessons should be our first choice.

We're only 2 lessons in, and I'm afraid the time is coming when we are asked to not come back. H's first lesson started off okay, but something, still unknown to the teacher and myself, upset her and she was fairly hysterical the remainder of the class. Gratefully, the other kids in the pool continued with their lessons as if a hysterical child was commonplace in such an environment. And I've been reassured by the teachers that it IS common. However, H has been the only one (including the babies) inconsolable thus far.

We have been talking up swim lessons all this week, to no avail. We've prayed for courage. Talked about what it means to have courage. Reassured. Encouraged. Bribed. Invented special sign language to help remind her to take deep breaths, listen, pray, etc. She's been consistent with her dislike for her lessons, but willing to try to be brave.

But.

The poor girl couldn't calm herself down. From the moment she walked into the pool area, she freaked out. I thought by me leaving, that might help. Instead, minutes after my leaving, Hannah was brought to me and I was told she threw up and that they had to evacuate the pool. I was of course, embarrassed. Then ashamed that my concern of other parents' reactions came before my compassion for my terrified little girl.

Here's where I'm stuck. When do I know enough is enough? I want my girl to have attributes like courage, commitment, persistence, hard work....and I know those traits don't come easily. But I also want her to know what it means to give and receive compassion, grace, and mercy. And I have to admit that although I may be more skilled in the former, I'm really weak in modeling the latter. I'm sure there are many of my former students and their parents out there who will vouch for this.

I intended this post to be a rather funny reflection on an embarrassing moment. Don't get me wrong, it still is funny and Hannah will probably grow very tired of hearing it told year after year. But I guess this experience is just one example of one of my biggest challenges in being a parent. And I really don't want to mess it up. I guess I need a little mercy myself.....

Yay for the underdog!

Early in June after checking our credit report, we discovered there were two medical collections on our report from 2004. It has taken me several weeks to investigate exactly what happened. Turns out when I went to my first prenatal appointment (when I was pregnant with Hannah), the blood work was sent to a lab. This lab apparently did not have any insurance information on me nor a current address. So two months later, they sent it to a collections agency.

The collections agency, our insurance company, and the hospital's lab, medical records, and billing departments all at one point, told us that we'll just have to pay for it. It's been frustrating, to say the least, to explain this long situation EVERY TIME I get on the phone. And customer service apparently doesn't mean that you can speak with your original customer service associate....or that they will actually care to understand the problem. While giving a summary of our situation, I could almost hear, on the other end of the line, their tone change when I used the phrase "collections agency." Immediately they didn't want to deal with it and seemed to assume if I let it get this far, I must be extremely irresponsible.

It was a beautiful day when I picked up my medical records which showed that we did, in fact, provide our current address and health insurance. And to top it off, the DIRECTOR of patient records called ME and APOLOGIZED for THEIR MISTAKE!!! Aaaaaah...it feels so very good to be vindicated!

Supposedly it will still take 3-6 months for these collections to be cleared from our records. But I don't care...it's $1000 that we don't have to pay. I cringe at how close I was to paying it, just to be done with it.

So here's what I've learned about this frustrating experience:
-Check your credit report every year. (I know, I know, I learned this the hard way.)
-Just because "big company" says I "just need to pay for it this time," doesn't necessarily mean they are right. Keep digging and asking questions....even if they don't want to go the extra mile for you. Being a nuisance has paid off.

She must have remembered our prayers last night

"Hannah, I want you to be a good listener."

"Mommy, I want to give you more patience."

46 months or so

Hannah,

I started writing letters to you long ago because of a blog I love to read, dooce.com. I don't know her, but her letters to her daughter are an honest and beautiful reflection of specific moments of motherhood. She has inspired me, among countless others I'm sure, to keep a record of this time in my life and yours. But more importantly, this process has helped me reflect on who YOU are and try to understand, really understand you; your fears, insecurities, joys, loves.


This stage in your life reminds me of when, as a little girl, I saw my mom reading a book with the phrase "strong-willed child" on the cover. I not-so-innocently asked her why she was reading it, and she just paused, looked up from her pages, and said, "Why do you THINK I'm reading this?"

This summer has been a move into a difficult and new territory for me. I think I can easily say that up until May or so, you've been a fairly "easy" child. I cognitively understand that you are growing up and trying to establish more independence, but to help you work this out on a day to day basis has been rather trying.

Of course, my own personal agenda for each moment and day, is our main point of tension. Like right now, as I sit with my computer on the patio, you are trying to narrate to me every move you make.

"Look mom. Look. I'm riding my horsey."

"Hey, mom. The baby is riding in the car with me. Look. LOOK."

That word, LOOK, is a loaded word. In fact, it's probably a glimpse into what you really want from me. Don't just glance my way, I want your FULL attention!

And now, out of desperation and because you know it gets me most every time, you've just asked to cuddle with me. And in my hard-hearted way, I say, "In just a minute."

To be fair though, MANY times you've used cuddling and kisses as a distraction from what you know you should be doing. Like SLEEPING, eating, going potty, SLEEPING, picking up toys, SLEEPING.

Well, despite what you think at times, I AM looking and watching. You've been fun to watch. Your little quirks and preferences come out and that just make those around you giggle...which you rarely appreciate....or maybe it's just a lack of understanding.

For instance, we have this morning ritual of reading the comics. I didn't realize how easily you catch on to random vocabulary until I overheard you reading to yourself later that morning,

"And then we'll go drink some margaritas! Won't that be fun?"


You LOVE reading. You'll sit on the couch for a long time, reading book after book after book. Calling it "reading" may be the incorrect term...more like "creative writing." Both your dad and I wonder if, after learning how to read, you'll grow tired of the actual storyline.

You still love clothes, hair, etc. You never miss telling me that you like my hair down whenever you see my ponytail.
One evening, we went to a Ronald McDonald magic show. You really weren't all that impressed with Ronald's string of scarves, or multiplying balls....but throughout the ENTIRE show, you kept whispering in my ear, "What COLOR are his SHOES?! I want to SEE his SHOES!"

It's very clear that you are an extrovert. You don't want to miss anything and in turn, don't want others to miss anything either. It is exhausting at times, but you clearly got that from me, not your father.

As a teacher, I had two dear and wise friends, Sue and Donna who somehow had this ability to get to the heart of the child and his/her behavior. Their influence transformed my heart towards my students and allowed me to especially love those who are at times challenging. I should reconnect with them and ask how I can better do this. I have a feeling they'll simply tell me what I already know: Listen. Slow down. Put YOUR agenda aside.

And if I'm honest, isn't that what I want? What we all want? Someone to take the time to understand, listen, and get to the heart of who I am or what I'm trying to communicate?

I want to understand you like that, Hannah. Being a teacher was just an eight hour job. But you and I are with each other all day, every day. And you want my FULL attention.

I know there is a valuable lesson in teaching you the appropriate time to ask for my full attention, but I don't want to miss the lesson you're trying to teach me. I truly hope, Hannah, as you look back on your childhood, you'll remember me truly looking at you, paying attention, listening. I'm sure you'll also remember times when I've let you down as well. But my hope is that you'll have more memories of the former, not the latter.

I love you,
Mom

20 week sonogram

Well, today we found out that we're having another girl!
Hannah was thrilled, of course, and I don't think Isaac was all that surprised. He has his own theories...feel free to ask him...as to why there are so many girls on my side of the family. But I'm pretty sure science is on my side....that and I've always pictured Isaac outnumbered, poor guy. But won't he be a great dad to teenage girls?! Boys will and should be very afraid.
But seriously, I thank God everyday for the protective father and husband that Isaac is to us.

Some photos of our little girl:


I think we may have a little thumb sucker.....


Supposedly, the three lines are proof we've got a little girl.

He's gonna kill me, but I can't help myself....

Well, Hannah and I made the long trek to Oshkosh in one day. I was determined to get it done, and luckily, Hannah cooperated. It was sweet to see Isaac walking to meet us on the stretch of dirt road leading to Grandma and Grandpa's house. Apparently he missed us as much as we missed him. =)

I love coming here. There's something about this place that makes me feel safe, relaxed, loved. My grandparents have always been these things for all of us.

Now we're off to my mom's place, then on to the mountains tomorrow. It will be a bit chaotic, but lots of firsts for Hannah and time with family.

Sidenote:
By the way, if you ever wonder what Isaac does, he was interviewed here.

Counting my blessings

It's been a rough day, or at least it has felt that way to me. But I need some perspective, so I'm remembering a few things I'm thankful for:

1. The way my friends love Hannah. They are good to Isaac and I as well, but they are so very good to my girl. I know they love her and she loves them right back.
2. My family. I still get sad at how far we all live apart, but I love them and appreciate more and more the ways they have shaped me into the person I now am.
3. My in-laws. I couldn't ask for more love, understanding, and sacrificial support....and I definitely don't deserve it.
4. My neighbors. Quirky (aren't we all?). Very helpful. They've gotten me into my locked house, lengthened the life of our vehicles, mowed our lawn, watched our dog, the list goes on....
5. Money. It never seems as if there's enough. But I still get to stay at home. Thank you, God.
6. Isaac's job and his hard work to do it well and provide for us. That isn't mentioned enough.
7. Modern conveniences. Many things may have broken down in the last several days, but I HAVE them, and don't necessarily NEED them.
8. Twizzlers pull-n-peel. Petty, yes, but very delicious.
9. The plethora of parks in our town. Vickie came over (see #1) so I could get out for a bit by myself...and I just sat in the sun at one of our beautiful parks.
10. Puzzles-what I brought with me for #9.....I love the way it relaxes me, yet exercises my brain at the same time.
11. Our dining table and patio. Nothing spectacular, but the conversations that have taken place have been good, challenging, enlightening, entertaining, and memorable.
12. Tonight's opportunity to ask Hannah for forgiveness. I've been very impatient with her and it's not all her fault. It's a reminder of my shortcomings and need for Jesus.

A must see

Hannah and I spent a couple hours at the pool with LoLo on Saturday. And we've discovered that H is quite the dancer and entertainer. LoLo posted it on her blog here. A bonus if you can identify what song she is dancing to. =)

I haven't tackled the first floor windows yet, but I was hosting my book group, so suddenly I felt the drive to clean, clean, clean!
Here's my list of accomplishments for the day:
-read a chapter of our book
-read the comics with Hannah
-swept and mopped the entire house
-dusted & straightened (with Hannah's help)
-2 loads of laundry
-made peanut butter scotchies for the book group
-washed, dried, and put away the dishes
-mowed the lawn
-watered the garden and plants
-swept the patio
-showered
-bathed Hannah
-scheduled the refrigerator repairman
-quick trip to Walmart-quick and Walmart usually don't go together, but today must have been my day!
-filled gas tank-even went inside to get my favorite Polar Pop
-and STILL managed to complete 85% of my daily puzzles!! (gotta keep my priorities straight)

I do realize that this list is nothing to some of you overachievers. But at times, I guess it just takes the knowledge that people will be coming over to see my mess to move me to do something about it.
I'm pooped.
Good night, Internet.

Isaac is gone for two weeks to "write a small book so he can get a floppy hat." Or to finish his thesis...however you want to look at it. He's promised to post his progress daily on his blog.

Since he's been working non-stop....the basement while he was home, and now deep into his books....I feel like I need to pick up the pace around here while he's gone. So today, I started washing the windows. Turns out I don't fully know what I'm doing, but I still managed wash all the 2nd floor exterior windows. It was a very good thing Vickie stopped by or I would have flooded the house. So now onto the first floor tomorrow....

Playing Tag

Laurie tagged me, and this gives me something to post, so here goes:

My Joys:
*Hannah
*Anticipating baby #2
*Spending quality time with people I love.

My Fears:
*Money. Yuck. Still trying to be a better manager of it.
*Wasting my life on petty, temporary goals.
*Being too much of a know-it-all that I push people away.

My Goals:
*Accept myself as God does.
*Love and care for my family and friends.
*Running another marathon....Chicago 2009.

My Current Obsessions/Collections:
*'Crosswords, sudoku, and cryptoquip....no big surprise to anyone, I'm sure.
*Waffles. Not very healthy, the the waffle iron is rather dangerous, but oh the heavenly breakfasts I'm having!!!
(update: I sadly had to throw it away. Supposedly it's a fire hazard when the plug is VERY warm to the touch and the entire appliance exudes a burning rubber smell....)
*My coupon collection....I know, no surprise here either.

Random Surprising Facts About Me:
*My blood type is B negative.....I know, shocking, huh?
*I really, really dislike seafood.
*I don't know....I'm probably more of an open book than I care to admit.

Alright...now it's my turn to tag 4 people:

1. my sisters
2. my childhood friend Jen, from Iowa.....I think you might read this periodically. =)
3. Babs (Sorry, Vickie. I stole a tag from you!)
4. Steph

Emma Kay Forman

Yesterday, we spent a good chunk of the day waiting for her arrival.....and here she is!
7 lbs. 12oz. 19.5 inches long. lots of dark hair!
Congratulations, Chris and Gretchen!

The new parents....



Uncle Isaac delivering food.....


Her first bath...

Her daddy admiring her soft hair.

11 weeks

Dear baby,
This week was technically our first meeting and I was so very excited and relieved to see your heartbeat. I will continue to pray that you will grow to become a healthy little one.

You have a big sister who, for a few months now, has been praying you would come....and is honing her teaching skills. I'm pretty sure she feels the urgency to learn everything there is to learn. "Why?" and "How come?" are her favorite and most often asked questions.

Your daddy is also preparing for your arrival. As I write this, he is finishing our basement...so you and your sister have a space to play and that we can have room for your nursery. So far, I'm just trying to feed you the right things....and trying to stay away from the wrong ones...which is harder than I'd like.

There will be many more people to introduce you to and and even more things to tell you. But for now, I just want you to know you are loved and we cannot wait to meet you.

Love,
your mama

Just call me fashionista

I'm not much of a trend setter. In fact, once I find a shirt I like, I usually just buy that same shirt in several colors. I usually start liking whatever the "new" thing months or even years after it's been around.

Over the past year, I've dreadfully noticed how the 80's styles are coming back. But I've recently discovered how much I loved a specific style of shirt. It reminds me of my favorite outfit in junior high. I LOVED this burgundy and black striped shirt with black leggings I bought at Maurices. I think I also had a green and navy striped one as well....Paris Sport Club. Do you remember it? Designed for daring teenage girls like me.

So here's the official shirt of the summer for me....I already have one in grey and black. I know, so very adventurous of me. But I even bought leggings! Now I just have to muster up the nerve to wear them.

Have you ever had one of those dreams where you are being pursued, but you can't move because it feels as if your feet are cemented to the ground? Or the dream where you somehow forget to get dressed before you head off to school, then the rest of the dream is spent desperately and futilely trying to get some sort of clothing on?

Well, these last several days have felt a little like that. It recently dawned on me that I never printed Laurie's newsletters, just emailed them....that was on April 8th! April 8th!

So I went to print and the old printer is discontinued and my computer no longer has a driver for it. So I find the driver online....and still doesn't work. Isaac says he'll have to get a CD from work. I can't wait that long, so I grab our other printer.
Out of ink. Of course. I go to refill the cartridge, take it home, still doesn't work. After 3 more trips, I am able to print 9 newsletters. Out of 108.

So this morning, I drive to Walmart and purchase new cartridges. Should have bought 2 sets. You'd think I have learned.

So far, I have about 40 completed (along with an additional apology/take responsibility for the tardiness schpeel) which my computer has printed at an agonizingly slow pace (I need more ram or something, Isaac says).

Okay, so it may not be as bad as public nudity, but this newsletter, of ALL newsletters is time sensitive. AARRGH!!!
What was I thinking?! I guess it doesn't matter at this point, but I'm looking forward to this heightened heart rate and sense of panic to subside.

the Sauder girls & kids

Hannah and I had a really nice time in Omaha catching up with my sisters and being amazed at how much the babies have grown. Here are a few pictures from the weekend:
(This has been sitting in my unpublished posts, waiting for me to add comments, but it's taken too long already. So feel free to suggest the appropriate captions.)

I saw a fox on the trail this morning.....a FOX!!

Update in pictures

Lots of activity here the last few weeks, but I just can't seem to muster up the energy to write about it. So here are some pictures:

For my birthday, my thoughtful husband and great friends planned "The Amazing Birthday Race." My apologies for my lack of pictures here. We were divided into teams, and sent on various missions....one was to eat a cheeseburger next to Abe Lincoln on the bench...Ryan actually bought a double cheeseburger since it was cheaper....but not as fast to eat.

They also made a crossword puzzle all about me (I felt a bit narcissistic...and by the way, I do NOT snort when I laugh),

Played sudoku with sidewalk chalk and a driveway, and took pictures with strangers doing various things. Our team found the PERFECT group of strangers: junior high girls!! (I wish I had the pictures to prove it!)

Vickie's birthday followed, so I made her a cake...


Followed by the anticpated Fondue Friday! Other than making WAY too much, it was very yummy. And I can't wait to try some more recipes! If it weren't for Chris, I wouldn't even have this picture. So thanks, Chris!


This past weekend, Hannah accomplished a few firsts....
using scissors....(She caught on rather quickly!)

...and planting a garden. This is a first for me as well!



Here are just a couple cute pictures taken this past week.



In the next few days, I'll be in Omaha catching up with my sisters and holding my niece and nephew. So more pictures to come!